Furniture compatibility

Today I came home and the house was rearranged just because. I married the right man. 

The Little Absences

Long-distance relationships suck. I don't think anyone really argues against that point, and if they do, they should be evaluating why they don't prefer being close to their partner. But it isn't just "living far away" that is frustrating, there's so much more to the struggle. And as I think about the little absences in my life having you a continent away, I wonder how I love you so terribly much. 

I miss how you warmed up my feet when they were cold. I miss how you always went to look for my robe when I was at home. I miss having your hand just a reach away in the back of the cab. I miss curling up to watch TV, feeling your laughter against my head. I miss the sparkle in your eye when we go shopping and you want me to try on the most ridiculous dresses. I miss how you cross the street with me. I miss the excitement on your face when you hand me cotton candy. I miss the weight of your head as you slept on my shoulder. 

Technology is wonderful, and it has made our time together a lot easier. But these are all things that technology cannot replace. Because technology can never replace the wonderful feeling of having you right by my side. 

Someone or Him

I've been a single adult for quite a few years, although not as long as some I know. And I don't pretend to claim 26 as a wise, old age. But there have been many moments in my life that I have struggled with a problem, traveled somewhere new, arrived home discouraged, learned something interesting, fought with a friend, etc that I have thought, "I wish someone were here to share this with me." Don't get me wrong, I love the life I have lived, and I wouldn't change these last 26 years at all. But there have been times I wished someone was there. For many years it was my family, and then in very special moments my friends have filled that void, but there is a melancholy realization that they won't be there for all of what you live. And when you go home at the end of the day, the only thing that greets you is a computer.

But supposedly this has all changed now. I found that "somebody" that I want to share my life with. Well, the reality is, that even though it is temporary, I still come home to a very empty house. I still cook, clean, shop, etc by myself. But here is the good difference. I no longer want somebody at my side. I want him.

I don't want someone to hold my hand during a movie, I want him to squeeze my hand in the parts that scare me most and make fun of me when I jump. I don't want someone to watch The Big Bang Theory with me, I want him there, staring at me like a stalker because he loves my geek laugh. I don't want someone to wash my dishes with me, I want him to come over and make fun of me for how many dirty dishes I have piled up but then wash them without a word of complaint. I don't want someone to run to the grocery store when I realize I'm missing an ingredient for a recipe I'm making, I want him to come back with 3 extra bags of random purchases he knew would make me smile. I don't want someone to listen to my problems, I want him to ask how he can make me happy, because he always does. I don't want someone who asks how work was, I want him here to inspire me so much I can't wait to go back to the office. I don't want someone to eat the cookies I bake, I want him to tell me that these are the best cookies he's ever eaten. I don't want someone to laugh with me when something is funny, I want him to make me laugh when nothing is funny. I don't want someone to ask me what I want to do for fun tonight, I want him to fill me with sugar because he knows how much more fun I'll be on a sugar rush. I don't want someone to kiss, I want him to love.

I don't just want someone anymore. I want him. I want him here with me.

Con tu puedo y con mi quiero, vamos juntos compañera

Hay aventuras que no esperas que sucedan, hay aventuras que las planificas y esperas que te pasen, hay aventuras que esperas y que nunca pasen. Hay de todo.

Pero hay aquellas en las que no estás solo, vas acompañado y disfrutas de cada nuevo giro de la historia, donde no hay bueno ni malo, sino oportunidades para disfrutar, aprender, saborear la delicia de existir cada día. Hay aventuras en las que con tu puedo y con mi quiero, vamos untos compañera.

No fui yo, Bennedeti fue quien dijo esa frase, pero hoy me "inzpira" más que nunca. Tu tan allá, yo tan aquí. Y es que no es nada para nosotros 5625.3 kilometros que nos separan. Bueno si es, debo confesar que el sabor de tus labios aunque jugemos al -thumbkiss- no, no es los mismo. Y tu sonrisa, por más retina que sea la pantalla, no, no es la misma.

Muchos se preguntarán como hemos sobrevivido -aunque no somos los primeros- en intentar y saborear la distancia. Lo cierto es que hay dos claves: 1) Un puedo y un quiero. 2) El Eterno. Cuando logras entender como pareja la real ecuación del amor, las cosas cambiar realmente y la perspectiva de lo que quieres hacer con tu relación es otra, ¿cuál es esa ecuación? Simple: 1+1=1.

Ayer fue el día de Valentín, -donde todos nos profesamos amor- aunque para ser honesto prefiero hacerlo en los otros 364 días del año que me sobran, diariamente. Y el lunes que viene -el 18- será nuestro primer año juntos.

La aventura con sazón a intercambio cultural ha tenido de todo. Y se viene mucho más con los planes con los que soñamos: Mr. Inz goes to Washington. Pero esa es otra historia que merecerá su propia página.

He descubierto que no podemos dejar que las circunstancias limiten nuestra felicidad.

He descubierto que solo tu -y tu pareja- son responsables de ser honestos consigo mismos y de disfrutar: vivir.

He descubierto.

Como salvas la distancia, no hay recetas, pero si tips:
Conversar siempre -tener iphones los dos :) -
Buscar aventuras juntos, aunque estemos lejos, jugar -drawsomething-
Compartir gustos -libros, series tv, música, cine-
Hacer planes al futuro -ir de compras, compartir los proyectos personales-
Vivir.

Hace unos días me preguntaron como sabes si la otra persona es la indicada para tu vida. Al responderle me dí cuenta de que nunca lo sabras, absolutos no hay. Lo que sabes es que puedes leer las señales y decidir ser mejor tu para el/ella.

Resucito cada día, anhelando tu sonrisa.

Es mi quiero y mi puedo, tus labios en mi oido.

Tus pupilas dilatas, felices me susurran

que las estrellas ya son nuestras

Los latidos de tu alma, muy fuerte presionan

mis manos en tu piel, 

una delicada melodía sale de tu boca,

juntos, para ti, para mi, para nadie más.

Son tus pies los que buscan los míos

prestos para emprender

cuanta aventura vengan

con dragones y molinos

por el Hades o los Eliseos,

juntos.

Cada noche muero, en el dulce sueño

a tu lado, esperando inciar

otra mañana a tu lado

juntos.

No hay recetas, para el amor. Un día hace más de un año y algo nunca imaginé que -tecnicamente- podría quedar enamorado tan profundamente de Angela. Hoy con casi dos años, no puedo pensar en un mañana sin ella. La vida ha sido clara conmigo: Ama con todas tus fuerzas. Se feliz con todas tus energías. No pierdas tiempo viviendo la vida de otros. Vive. 

Con tu puedo y con mi quiere, vamos juntos compañera.

En este video se resumen -vagamente- un año de aventuras.

The Man I Will Marry

9 months ago I stepped into an adventure that I never plan on backing out of. Over a year ago I met him, but I wasn't clever enough to notice how amazing he was at first glace. But thankfully after years of looking, I found who wants to make me laugh, hold me when I cry and will fight for me against the whole world.

And yet somehow, I keep making him fight against me instead. I have always been the one to push away those I love. But the man I marry is the one person in my life I do not want away from me. He is my best friend. He is the one who smiles when he sees me, who accepts my cheesy gestures, and who can make me feel love with his every action. If I succeeded in pushing him away, I would be destroying half of myself.

Every day is an opportunity to learn. Learn from me. When someone sits next to you and wants to understand you, please, open up. When someone does countless acts trying to make your life better, do not doubt how much they care. And most importantly, at the end of the day, you can never say "I love you" too much. And sometimes it helps to tell yourself "I love him" every once in a while as well.

Best Time of Your Life

Oh to be young and wild...

During the late years of high school and going into college, we often hear, "enjoy this time, they will be the best years of your life." Maybe high school sucks or maybe it was amazing. College could have been a battle or when you finally flowered. For me, college was a wonderful time in my life. I had amazing friends who lived right next door, I got to learn skills I never would have imagined, I could run off to IHOP at 1 in the morning and not get heartburn, and I had several opportunities to take off and explore the world around me like I had never dreamed all in the name of education. 

And sometimes looking forward to this great period of life is helpful, especially for those of us who had awkward years in high school. Sometimes the hope of a better future is what gets us through. As you grow up, however, we start looking forward more than in the present. Maybe we are dreaming of that perfect job, or a fancy wedding day. Maybe it is something as 'simple' as stability or having kids. Either way, we entertain this mindset of "won't it be nice once I'm finally... I'll be so happy then." And it is even more tempting when the present is not the most exciting or ideal time. 

Daniel and I are both in states of limbo. Between struggles at work and a lack of solidity of our professional or personal futures, it is so easy for me to either think negatively or stare straight forward imagining how great "once we..." will be. For example, this week Daniel's iPhone was stolen out of his backpack (among other valuable things). And I started thinking, "won't it be nice when we're at the point where we have enough saved up to replace it right away." But today it hit me: We are living the best time of our life right now. I cannot let the future be the best part of my life because what if it does not turn out how I am imagining it or worse yet, what if it never comes?

Even when things don't go right, at least I'm not alone

So here is my new (still in practice) mindset. We have no idea what our next step is and we feel lost. I may never again have so many practical choices in front of me. Someday I might not be able to point to anywhere in the world and say "there!" And maybe sometimes I get over anxious thinking about when we are married and how nice it will be then to see each other every day, etc. But this is the time in my life where I am falling deeper in love with an amazing man and figuring out how we can be together. Tomorrow I plan on loving him more, but so far, right now, this is the most I have ever loved him. Up until today, this is the best time of my life. The past was amazing, yes, and the future, we hope, will be incredible. But neither of those facts keep right now from being the best time of your life, and mostly because right now is what you have. Today may be simple, and maybe the best part of it will just be the chocolate that you sneak when no one is watching. There are two great tricks I have learned from Daniel (although I am not sure that he knew he was teaching me). Either see the amazing in what you are living right now, or find something to do to make today incredible. The fact is, someone would love to have your life right now. Today, no matter what happens, I am loved by an incredible man and that is something I have been wanting for years. 

So let right now be the best time of your life. 

Cheers!

Virtual Love

I am currently thousands of miles away from my best friend (about 3645.84 more or less). Now if I think of it positively, it could be worse. In my grandparents' day during WWII, they wrote letters and waited weeks for them to arrive. My parents took a big technological step forward and sent cassette tapes back and forth with my grandparents when they lived over seas. As I (not so young) kid I remember emails and when I was lucky long phone calls with friends who moved away. But minutes were always watched because no one wanted to be left holding that long distance bill when it was over.

Thankfully so many more ways are opened up to us. Between instant messaging, twitter, facebook, gtalk, and of course any couple's personal favorite, skype, there is no need to wait patiently to hear from your loved one. Yes, we have all heard about how social networks are taking away our social skills or just give us the impression that we have 800+ friends while slowly separating us from real relationships. However, it is a wonderful feeling that even though far away, I can see what Daniel finds interesting on his facebook, follow what is on his mind on twitter and can speak to him "face to face" on skype whenever I need to be calmed down or just to laugh. We are certainly not the only ones who find solace in virtual love. Although we do not have any (thankfully this is just a brief vacation apart) there are even long-distance pillows to keep you connected from afar.

I remember a line from Clucky and Marian in the Disney version of Robin Hood which quoted the old saying, "'absence makes the heart grow fonder'... or forgetful." And I think that is very true, especially considering the people and circumstances. On many occasions, mercifully for my adolescent heart, being away from someone did help me get over them. Not to mention how (looking back) I am grateful that in several instances being away from someone has given me the perspective I needed to realize that we were not ment to be together. Now, Daniel and I have only been apart for a month and I will see him again in a few weeks, but this limited time apart has opened my eyes. It is not the same as in the past, but still, it is helpful to step away from the cloud nine that I float on when staring into his eyes in order to get a bit logical. And even logically, yes there are things that we both need to work on, not to mention logistical questions that become more prevalent, however my heart is not the only organ agreeing to this partnership. He does not only make my heart flutter, but even on paper, logically, I want to be with him. I am sure that sounds sappy, but when all we have is words through a computer and brief memories holding us together, it is enough to want more. I will continue to feel his love from afar until, in only 14 days, I get feel his hug again.

Now, your Peruicanos challenge for the day: Go and find 10 people who mean a lot to you and give them hugs. Enjoy them while they are here.