The Man I Will Marry

9 months ago I stepped into an adventure that I never plan on backing out of. Over a year ago I met him, but I wasn't clever enough to notice how amazing he was at first glace. But thankfully after years of looking, I found who wants to make me laugh, hold me when I cry and will fight for me against the whole world.

And yet somehow, I keep making him fight against me instead. I have always been the one to push away those I love. But the man I marry is the one person in my life I do not want away from me. He is my best friend. He is the one who smiles when he sees me, who accepts my cheesy gestures, and who can make me feel love with his every action. If I succeeded in pushing him away, I would be destroying half of myself.

Every day is an opportunity to learn. Learn from me. When someone sits next to you and wants to understand you, please, open up. When someone does countless acts trying to make your life better, do not doubt how much they care. And most importantly, at the end of the day, you can never say "I love you" too much. And sometimes it helps to tell yourself "I love him" every once in a while as well.

Best Time of Your Life

Oh to be young and wild...

During the late years of high school and going into college, we often hear, "enjoy this time, they will be the best years of your life." Maybe high school sucks or maybe it was amazing. College could have been a battle or when you finally flowered. For me, college was a wonderful time in my life. I had amazing friends who lived right next door, I got to learn skills I never would have imagined, I could run off to IHOP at 1 in the morning and not get heartburn, and I had several opportunities to take off and explore the world around me like I had never dreamed all in the name of education. 

And sometimes looking forward to this great period of life is helpful, especially for those of us who had awkward years in high school. Sometimes the hope of a better future is what gets us through. As you grow up, however, we start looking forward more than in the present. Maybe we are dreaming of that perfect job, or a fancy wedding day. Maybe it is something as 'simple' as stability or having kids. Either way, we entertain this mindset of "won't it be nice once I'm finally... I'll be so happy then." And it is even more tempting when the present is not the most exciting or ideal time. 

Daniel and I are both in states of limbo. Between struggles at work and a lack of solidity of our professional or personal futures, it is so easy for me to either think negatively or stare straight forward imagining how great "once we..." will be. For example, this week Daniel's iPhone was stolen out of his backpack (among other valuable things). And I started thinking, "won't it be nice when we're at the point where we have enough saved up to replace it right away." But today it hit me: We are living the best time of our life right now. I cannot let the future be the best part of my life because what if it does not turn out how I am imagining it or worse yet, what if it never comes?

Even when things don't go right, at least I'm not alone

So here is my new (still in practice) mindset. We have no idea what our next step is and we feel lost. I may never again have so many practical choices in front of me. Someday I might not be able to point to anywhere in the world and say "there!" And maybe sometimes I get over anxious thinking about when we are married and how nice it will be then to see each other every day, etc. But this is the time in my life where I am falling deeper in love with an amazing man and figuring out how we can be together. Tomorrow I plan on loving him more, but so far, right now, this is the most I have ever loved him. Up until today, this is the best time of my life. The past was amazing, yes, and the future, we hope, will be incredible. But neither of those facts keep right now from being the best time of your life, and mostly because right now is what you have. Today may be simple, and maybe the best part of it will just be the chocolate that you sneak when no one is watching. There are two great tricks I have learned from Daniel (although I am not sure that he knew he was teaching me). Either see the amazing in what you are living right now, or find something to do to make today incredible. The fact is, someone would love to have your life right now. Today, no matter what happens, I am loved by an incredible man and that is something I have been wanting for years. 

So let right now be the best time of your life. 

Cheers!

Virtual Love

I am currently thousands of miles away from my best friend (about 3645.84 more or less). Now if I think of it positively, it could be worse. In my grandparents' day during WWII, they wrote letters and waited weeks for them to arrive. My parents took a big technological step forward and sent cassette tapes back and forth with my grandparents when they lived over seas. As I (not so young) kid I remember emails and when I was lucky long phone calls with friends who moved away. But minutes were always watched because no one wanted to be left holding that long distance bill when it was over.

Thankfully so many more ways are opened up to us. Between instant messaging, twitter, facebook, gtalk, and of course any couple's personal favorite, skype, there is no need to wait patiently to hear from your loved one. Yes, we have all heard about how social networks are taking away our social skills or just give us the impression that we have 800+ friends while slowly separating us from real relationships. However, it is a wonderful feeling that even though far away, I can see what Daniel finds interesting on his facebook, follow what is on his mind on twitter and can speak to him "face to face" on skype whenever I need to be calmed down or just to laugh. We are certainly not the only ones who find solace in virtual love. Although we do not have any (thankfully this is just a brief vacation apart) there are even long-distance pillows to keep you connected from afar.

I remember a line from Clucky and Marian in the Disney version of Robin Hood which quoted the old saying, "'absence makes the heart grow fonder'... or forgetful." And I think that is very true, especially considering the people and circumstances. On many occasions, mercifully for my adolescent heart, being away from someone did help me get over them. Not to mention how (looking back) I am grateful that in several instances being away from someone has given me the perspective I needed to realize that we were not ment to be together. Now, Daniel and I have only been apart for a month and I will see him again in a few weeks, but this limited time apart has opened my eyes. It is not the same as in the past, but still, it is helpful to step away from the cloud nine that I float on when staring into his eyes in order to get a bit logical. And even logically, yes there are things that we both need to work on, not to mention logistical questions that become more prevalent, however my heart is not the only organ agreeing to this partnership. He does not only make my heart flutter, but even on paper, logically, I want to be with him. I am sure that sounds sappy, but when all we have is words through a computer and brief memories holding us together, it is enough to want more. I will continue to feel his love from afar until, in only 14 days, I get feel his hug again.

Now, your Peruicanos challenge for the day: Go and find 10 people who mean a lot to you and give them hugs. Enjoy them while they are here.